shrinks are fun
Jul. 27th, 2006 03:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
purplekitteMy prompt for today was Unohana/Byakuya, but I ended up celebrating the opening of ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
aizenmomo. Longest story posted on my lj yet.
Title: “Psychiatry”
Fandom: Bleach
Characters: Aizen, psychiatrist, mentions of others, implied Aizen/Momo
Rating: PG
Word Count: 642
Time: 44 minutes
Spoilers: SS arc
Disclaimer: Bleach not mine.
“And what was the purpose of your visit, again?”
“I resolved see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage, as of the Evil Overlord List.”
“Well, do you have any unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits?”
“Not that I know of.”
The psychiatrist adjusted the glasses on bridge of her nose and tapped her pen on her clipboard. “Well, then. You listed your occupation as ‘evil mastermind, ruler of Hueco Mundo’. Why don’t you tell me about what you’ve done so far in the evil business?”
“Well, I used to distraction caused by Kuchiki Rukia’s rescuers to fake my death. Then I killed the Central 46 Chambers and hid in the Seijoutoukyorin and impersonated their orders.”
“And how did faking your death make you feel? Aware of your own mortality?”
“Not really. I just saw it as a test of my powers of illusion.”
She wrote down Afraid to die.
“I left my vice-captain a letter implicating my death on her childhood best friend. My little Momo-chan is so cute.”
“Was this directly helpful to your plan?”
“Not really. It’s so cute how she’ll do anything for me. She never stopped looking at me with those big trusting eyes, even after I stabbed her.”
“You stabbed her? Is she dead?”
“No.” Seemingly offhanded, but slightly sharp.
Has feeling for his vice-captain that he won’t admit to.
“Then her friend came in and saw her and attacked me. I stabbed him too.”
“Is he dead?”
“No.”
Leaves enemies alive rather than finishing them off when he can.
“Oh, then Unohana came in and decided there was no point in keeping my little secret a secret any longer.
Afraid of Unohana. Sensibly. She had dumped Byakuya off on Unohana just a few days ago. He needed someone to politely serve him tea and tell him, in the politest possible way, with an iron tone, that he was an idiot and needed a girlfriend.
“And then?”
“Since Rukia’s execution had fallen through, I sent Tousen to get her and I removed the hougyoku from her.”
“Did you kill her?”
“I was going to let Gin do it, but Byakuya got in the way.”
“Were you disappointed?”
“Fairly unconcerned, actually. She was no longer of any importance.”
“Do you feel about Urahara Kisuke creating the hougyoku, while you had to go through all this trouble to steal it?”
“Hmm? I don’t really have any opinion about that.” His eye twitched.
Not Mayuri, but still bitter. “I can’t help you unless you tell me the truth about what you’re feeling. Now, you seem to have changed your physical appearance drastically, recently.”
He leaned back in his chair and ran a hand through his Dracula-esque hair. “I no longer had to maintain an illusion of… niceness.”
She considered for a moment before writing, Dork. Ashamed of it. Trying changing physical appearance to disguise it behind a veil of evil.
“I wonder what cute little Momo-chan would think of me now?”
She studied his facial expression carefully. That settled it. Obsessed with his vice-captain. Quite possibly in love with her, in a stalker sort of way.
“I’m sure she would be confused by the change, but would continue to see you in the same way. Your next appointment is tomorrow at five. I’ll look over your charts before then and have some exercises for you to overcome some habits of yours that might get in the way of your ruling the world.” It was always better not to tell men who wanted to be God what the problems they wouldn’t admit to were, outright.
“Thank you for your time, ma’am.” He held out a hand.
“I’m here for your peace of mind, Aizen Sousuke-san. Thank you for speaking with me. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
aizenmomo. Longest story posted on my lj yet.Title: “Psychiatry”
Fandom: Bleach
Characters: Aizen, psychiatrist, mentions of others, implied Aizen/Momo
Rating: PG
Word Count: 642
Time: 44 minutes
Spoilers: SS arc
Disclaimer: Bleach not mine.
“And what was the purpose of your visit, again?”
“I resolved see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage, as of the Evil Overlord List.”
“Well, do you have any unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits?”
“Not that I know of.”
The psychiatrist adjusted the glasses on bridge of her nose and tapped her pen on her clipboard. “Well, then. You listed your occupation as ‘evil mastermind, ruler of Hueco Mundo’. Why don’t you tell me about what you’ve done so far in the evil business?”
“Well, I used to distraction caused by Kuchiki Rukia’s rescuers to fake my death. Then I killed the Central 46 Chambers and hid in the Seijoutoukyorin and impersonated their orders.”
“And how did faking your death make you feel? Aware of your own mortality?”
“Not really. I just saw it as a test of my powers of illusion.”
She wrote down Afraid to die.
“I left my vice-captain a letter implicating my death on her childhood best friend. My little Momo-chan is so cute.”
“Was this directly helpful to your plan?”
“Not really. It’s so cute how she’ll do anything for me. She never stopped looking at me with those big trusting eyes, even after I stabbed her.”
“You stabbed her? Is she dead?”
“No.” Seemingly offhanded, but slightly sharp.
Has feeling for his vice-captain that he won’t admit to.
“Then her friend came in and saw her and attacked me. I stabbed him too.”
“Is he dead?”
“No.”
Leaves enemies alive rather than finishing them off when he can.
“Oh, then Unohana came in and decided there was no point in keeping my little secret a secret any longer.
Afraid of Unohana. Sensibly. She had dumped Byakuya off on Unohana just a few days ago. He needed someone to politely serve him tea and tell him, in the politest possible way, with an iron tone, that he was an idiot and needed a girlfriend.
“And then?”
“Since Rukia’s execution had fallen through, I sent Tousen to get her and I removed the hougyoku from her.”
“Did you kill her?”
“I was going to let Gin do it, but Byakuya got in the way.”
“Were you disappointed?”
“Fairly unconcerned, actually. She was no longer of any importance.”
“Do you feel about Urahara Kisuke creating the hougyoku, while you had to go through all this trouble to steal it?”
“Hmm? I don’t really have any opinion about that.” His eye twitched.
Not Mayuri, but still bitter. “I can’t help you unless you tell me the truth about what you’re feeling. Now, you seem to have changed your physical appearance drastically, recently.”
He leaned back in his chair and ran a hand through his Dracula-esque hair. “I no longer had to maintain an illusion of… niceness.”
She considered for a moment before writing, Dork. Ashamed of it. Trying changing physical appearance to disguise it behind a veil of evil.
“I wonder what cute little Momo-chan would think of me now?”
She studied his facial expression carefully. That settled it. Obsessed with his vice-captain. Quite possibly in love with her, in a stalker sort of way.
“I’m sure she would be confused by the change, but would continue to see you in the same way. Your next appointment is tomorrow at five. I’ll look over your charts before then and have some exercises for you to overcome some habits of yours that might get in the way of your ruling the world.” It was always better not to tell men who wanted to be God what the problems they wouldn’t admit to were, outright.
“Thank you for your time, ma’am.” He held out a hand.
“I’m here for your peace of mind, Aizen Sousuke-san. Thank you for speaking with me. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
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no subject
Date: 2006-07-27 09:25 pm (UTC)*snicker* *giggle* Heh--I love it.
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Date: 2006-07-28 12:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-27 09:27 pm (UTC)Aizen is such a hot stalker/pedophile. D:
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Date: 2006-07-27 11:06 pm (UTC)LOL I though I'd never see the day when an Aizen humour fic has been made. XD
Props to you, that was really good =3
no subject
Date: 2006-07-28 12:21 am (UTC)it be intresting to c u create another one
Date: 2008-09-21 11:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-06-04 03:02 am (UTC)And several years later. . .
This was the most hilarious thing about Aizen I have ever read. XD
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Date: 2010-06-04 11:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-06-04 08:17 pm (UTC)I can see how it would be. And I never thought I'd read something with Aizen that made me laugh so hard it hurt.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-26 04:35 am (UTC)